


The Talk

by SkiaWolf



Category: Tales of Zestiria
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Comedy, I have no idea what to tag this as, The Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 14:52:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10811238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkiaWolf/pseuds/SkiaWolf
Summary: Sorey and Mikleo are curious about how babies are made.





	The Talk

**Author's Note:**

> ... I don't know. The idea came to me, and for some stupid reason, I decided to write it.
> 
> Why

It was a natural thing for children to be curious about the world around them. However, Zenrus found before long that Sorey and Mikleo were more curious than other children. As they grew older, this curiosity only grew, developing their love for history and, though Zenrus often scolded them for running off without permission, they began to explore ruins together excitedly.

This sight couldn't have been more pleasant, especially considering the two were human and seraph. Seeing Mikleo grow at the same rate as Sorey and getting along with the other as much as he did brought warmth to Zenrus' heart.

He was ready to help the two boys with anything they wanted to know and would gladly answer any question. This was why he gave the boys a smile when they came up to him one day, a question running through their minds.

“Gramps, can we ask you something?” Sorey began.

“Of course you can. What is it?”

“Sorey and I are confused over something about humans,” Mikleo explained.

“How do they make babies?” Sorey added for his friend. Zenrus seemed to choke on nothing and began to splutter. “Are you okay?”

“I'm fine, Sorey,” he answered, trying his best to smile, but he also wanted to escape from this situation as fast as possible.

He should have expected this sooner or later – after all, the boys were beginning to reach their teens. But despite how he _should_ have expected it, he hadn't, causing him to have no preparation for this day.

“So how _do_ they?”

“Well, Sorey..." he paused, questioning whether or not to get someone else to do this for him, before realising that the boys looked up to them too much to seek information from someone else. “Babies are made when a man and a woman love each other very much.”

“Why man and woman?”

He _did_ find himself smiling at Sorey questioning that as opposed to the vague answer. “Because… Well, boys cannot become pregnant.”

“Oh. But Mikleo _looks_ like a girl, so can he still become pregnant?”

“I do _not!”_ Mikleo snapped, face flushing from anger.

“No Sorey, Mikleo cannot become pregnant.” He had to stop himself from laughing.

“But why not?” Sorey pushed. “What stops him from becoming pregnant?”

Zenrus was beginning to realise that vague answers weren't going to cut it. “To begin with, seraphim cannot reproduce, so even if Mikleo _was_ a girl, he would not be able to have a baby. But the other reason… Well, boys are not biologically able to have children because of their… Parts.”

“Parts?” Sorey and Mikleo both echoed simultaneously. Would Elysia be fine if Zenrus decided to jump off of it?

“Yes, boys. Men and women both have different parts. Women have something called a womb, which the baby grows inside. Men don't have this.”

He was hoping that they would be satisfied with that answer, but of course, they wouldn't be.

“So what do men _do_ have?” Sorey questioned, oblivious, before he slammed a fist down onto his hand. “ _Oh!_ Is it our willies?”

“That would make sense,” Mikleo commented with a nod.

“Yes, that's right, Sorey.” He never thought he would dislike their curiosity, but here he was.

“So what do girls have?” Mikleo asked.

“ _Vaginas,_ Mikleo,” Zenrus sighed, having decided that straight answers might have now been the way to go to get out of this quickly.

“ _Oh.”_

“So Mikleo wouldn't be able to become pregnant even if he _was_ a human because he doesn't have a vagina or a womb?” Sorey asked.

“Yes.”

“That's starting to make sense! But how does –”

“What's going on over here?” a voice suddenly asked, Zenrus unbelievably grateful to turn and see Mason.

“The boys have been, well...”

“We're learning how babies are made!” Sorey exclaimed enthusiastically. Mason's lips curled, trying to stop himself from laughing.

“I see. Then Zenrus, I wish you luck with your talk...”

“Would you not like to assist me?” he asked, forcing a smile with a pleading look in his eyes.

“I think you're most suitable for this task,” Mason commented, before walking away. His lowered head and shaking shoulders suggested that he was laughing whilst doing so.

“So anyway, as I was saying,” Sorey continued. “I get that we have different parts and that only human girls can be pregnant. But _how_ do the parts _make_ the child?”

Zenrus sighed again. “That is through something we call… Making love. Or sex, put more simply. It is something that both seraphs and humans can do.”

“What do they do when making love?”

“I do not think it is necessary to –” He stopped speaking at the boys staring intensely at him. “You will keep asking until I explain it _,_ will you not?”

“Yes,” they both chorused.

Zenrus let out a sigh, before clearing his throat. “All right, if that is what you wish… Men are able to produce something call sperm, which is ejaculated - so 'shot out of', if you will - from their penis into the woman's vagina. Saving details, women have eggs inside them which the sperm fertilises. They fall pregnant from this.”

This was all spoken very fast, so much so that Sorey and Mikleo simply stared for a moment.

“You saved details?” Mikleo then broke the silence with.

“Yes, but you do not need to know everything. That is the basics.”

“I think I _kind of_ get it,” Sorey said, stroking his chin. “I think...”

“It is fine to not completely understand it at first. You will understand it more in time. I'll see if I can find any books which you can study with."

“But wait, you always said that people can love the same gender, right? So it seems sad that something called 'making love' is only for men and women...”

Zenrus was torn between finding this statement sweet or becoming frustrated at yet another explanation.

“Making love is something any couple can do even if they don't want a child. It is an enjoyable act for many individuals."

“Oh! So Mikleo and I could, then?”

“ _W-What?!”_ Mikleo spluttered.

“Do not even _think_ about it, Sorey!” Zenrus exclaimed, voice rising quickly. “You are far too young!”

“I'm not thinking about doing that _now_! Just when we're older!”

“Still, Sorey...” Zenrus sighed. Mikleo seemed to be trying to speak, but was mostly making incoherent noises.

“But wait, how would two _boys_ make love, then?”

“I am _not_ telling you that, Sorey,” Zenrus responded, deciding he had to draw a line _somewhere._ “That can wait until you are older.”

“Awh...”

“We _did_ only come here to ask how babies were made,” Mikleo huffed, folding his arms. “Now you're just being embarrassing.”

“Someone's still mad that I said he looks like a girl.”

“I _do not_ look like a girl!”

Their bickering continued, Zenrus deciding to take the opportunity to back away, releasing a deep sigh. That was much harder than he would have imagined.

“How did it go?” Mason's voice said from behind him.

“I suppose it went well,” Zenrus responded. “Though I do not know what I'm going to do with those two.”

A smile formed on his face as he watched Sorey tackle Mikleo to the ground, who screamed with laughter at hands tickling his sides.

At least, for now, they were still innocent.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I think we all need to give Zenrus a pat on the back to be honest. Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
